Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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