I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Randomize
