Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
