was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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