All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
