Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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