he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
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