love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
