you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
