So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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