drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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