I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
