apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Randomize
