Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize