My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
