that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
