dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
