Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
