nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
