i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
you would pick up someone in the library
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
