i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Randomize
