he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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