Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
