It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
