But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
