I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
