Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
