i just wanna soil my oats bro
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
