He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
