im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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