This is not my ceiling
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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