i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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