A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
