If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
