why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
