Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
