I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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