ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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