awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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