Texts From Last Night · Zephikins's Favorites

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Zephikins's Favorites Texts:

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.

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(713): View more from Texas

I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever

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(719): View more from Colorado

Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.

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