And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
