i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
