I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I wish there were birth control emojis
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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