Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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