It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Randomize
