walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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