Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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