That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
