Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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