okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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